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About Like A Garment: Intimacy In Islam
As- Salaam Alaikum! I welcome you to our ‘Like A Garment’ e-book, an initiative that seeks to educate Muslims to find conjugal bliss in their marriages. The name of this project came from one of the most beautiful, poetic and profound metaphors of the Qur’an. Allah states, “Permitted for you, during the night of the fast, that you approach your wives. They are your garments, and you are their garments” [al-Baqarah; 187]. In this verse, each spouse is described as a ‘garment’ to the other. The famous exegete Ibn Jarir al-Tabari (d. 311) stated that this description most aptly described the act of intimacy between the spouses, for during that act, each spouse sheds his or her other garments and then wraps around the other, taking the place of clothes. Al-Qurtubi (d. 671) also comments on this metaphor, and adds that just as clothes protect their wearer from the external elements, similarly each spouse protects the other from external passions that would harm a marriage. Combining between the various explanations of this beautiful metaphor found in the books of tafseer, we can derive many meanings from it: - The act of procreation is so intimate that it is literally as if one of the spouses covers up the other, just as clothing covers up one’s body. Another euphemism that the Qur’aan uses for the sexual act is the verb ghashsha, which means ‘to cover up, to envelop’. - One primary purpose of clothing is to conceal one’s nakedness, since this nakedness (or `awrah) is embarrassing to display, and should be hidden from the eyes of others. Similarly, each spouse conceals the other spouse’s faults, and does not reveal them to others. - Clothing protects one from the external elements, such as heat and cold. Similarly, spouses protect one another from external desires that originate from many different sources. By satisfying these desires within the confines of marriage, external passions are removed. - Clothing is the primary method through which humans beautify themselves. Without clothing, one is incomplete and naked. Similarly, spouses beautify and complete one another; when a person is not married, he or she is not yet complete and has not reached his or her full potential. Marriage is an essential part of being fully human, just like clothes are an essential part of being fully civilized. - Clothes are only worn in front of others, and are not necessary in front of spouses. It is only in front of one’s spouse that the other spouse can discard his or her garments. - Clothes are the closest thing to one’s body. Nothing comes between a person and his or her clothes. So the analogy of spouses being ‘like clothes to one another’ implies such a closeness – there is nothing, literally and metaphorically, that should come between spouses.
