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Let’s say that the summer is ending and you are about to embark on your first semester as a college student. Naturally, you are very excited and thrilled at the chance to escape from under your parents’ watchful eyes for several years. Needless to say, you are anticipating all the great parties and sporting events you’re going to attend and thinking of all the early morning classes you’re going to skip. What you might not be thinking about are a few of the other topics I’m here to guide you through, including [but not limited to]: killer squirrels, crazy but not-quite-homicidal roommates, transportation that will make you homicidal, and the great culinary disasters that await you. While possibly impractical in certain parts, I’m sure you’ll find this guide a great first step on adjusting to your new life as a college student.